Saturday, July 21, 2007

FINELLA

FINELLA

Coal black hair,

cat green eyes,

and a look that could

put you through the floor,

this was Finella,

this was my mother.

Intelligent, warm,

she reminisced about India,

tigers, servants and love,

mostly about love.

Vivacious, captivating,

but frighteningly complicated

at times even scary

as she battled with demons

that incited great rages.

She dealt with officialdom

like it wasn’t there,

no one questioned her,

ever,

it simply never happened

yet she never raised her voice,

simply an eyebrow that had

pedantic bullies shaking in their shoes.

Words were her weapon, her manipulating tool,

spoken or written with great panache.

Her flamboyant writing mirrored her image,

in an almost uncanny way,

as she dreamed her unfulfilled dream.

Getting the Finger out.

I have been suffering a double dose of procrastination of late so was doubly surprised when I tried to log in tonight and found I needed to use my Google account. The thing is I have been back up in Scotland, enjoying precious time with all my girls and grandchildren. There are some things that money just can't buy and a day like I had on the beach last Sunday at beautiful Elie has given me memories I shall cherish always.

All I want to do is get back to Scotland and after a recent interview it is looking as though my dream is going to come true. I will say no more right now for fear of jeopardizing events, but hopefully my next entry will see me back where I belong, away from the concrete jungle of the south where even the most ramshackle shack of a house is making silly money that no one can afford.

I keep thinking about two things; one, what is happening in China, where thousands and thousands of dogs and cats are being brutally killed. Not just an ordinary death I hasten to add, but a slow lingering fate, because it gives more flavour that way. For Christ's sake, what sort of a world do we live in?

And like every other mother on the planet I think of little Madeleine and what has become of her and all the other children who right now should be home in their in their beds. If only we could wave a magic wand and wake up tomorrow morning to good news. What a happy day that would be.

I need to start thinking about how I am going to transport all my "guff" back to Scotland. Blimey I need to do some serious downsizing in the wardrobe department, but hurrah, hurrah, I will soon be back in the land of good National Hunt racing. God Bless the full length cashmere Jaeger coat purchased for a fiver.